missing bits

Woooops ,
i havnt beeen on in ages .
sorry ><
anyways
friday: goood day, lol pat visited me super awkward :S
like omgshhh , scaryyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy.
worked with kjaaaay .
buh its aiiiiiiiiteee .
saturday: went shopping, taxed stuffffff
wanted to go aunty loi's brithday ><
wanted to sleep over
switched with lily for sundays shift :)
found out that nanay past away,
went to telles' uncle's funeral.
very depressigna nd sad
sunday: woke up early toooooo, go to work at 8
fcuk so tiring :)
oh wellll, so bored,
did nothing for rest of day .
monday: stayed home, boreddd .
went livo with melson and ian for a drive :)
we wer, okay :D
OMGSH DNM WITH SHARIZAAAAAAAAAAAAA
lol
LOL ,
tuesday: nothing muchhh ,.
neeeda get mentor!!! ><
wednesday: did nothing, people talking about meee and my so called crush, which id ont!!!!
LOL .
and told my metor to giveme a time, and told me to wait tomorrrow
buh mother fcuker i have an excursion tomorrrow dumbasss ><
welll, ill talk to her today :)
LOL
omgsh r.i.p nanay .
:(
i wanted to say aproper good bye .
buh i couldnt coz i couldnt afford to go phils .
i missss her too bits :(
okay
im done
ttyl

BONDING TIMES

Hello there .
ahahhah monday , me and sharizaa bonded
and literally shitted ourselves when my brother was reachoing for sharizaa 's blogg
he only read abit
buh i doubt it
lucky we kinda changed it
i think she changed it again
woooooow .
anyways
me and her are like full tight
wer gunna go city
aka. pancakes on the rocks :)
gtg
ttyl

misss me?

i miss you :(

em&jaye quote moment :)

Listening: Daniel D - cherish every moment
fweeling: sad
time:909PM

a few quotes that make me sad :)
buh its cool coz im doing sad quotes with bffffffffffffffffff jayeeeeeeeee:)


weve been through thick and thin, its just that all those bumps in the road wer wasted


"turning a friend into a lover is way easier than turning a lover into a friend .. D:"


"i knew that looking back on the tears would make me laugh, but i never knew that looking back on the laughs would make me cry"


"Love can hurt when you give someone your everything, your whole heart .. And they return it in pieces"


Love is like a war. Easy to start, hard to end and impossible to forget..


Dont hold on to anger, hurt or pain. they steal your energy and keep you from love ..


It is terrible to be alone, and TERRIBLE TO BE IN LOVE.. but one is cheaper than the other ..


First impressions are everything. Conversations are the rest. Where my heart still is, I admit I'm not too sure. And it got me thinking, what is the fine line between loving someone and being in love with them? What makes you think that they're your only one? What makes you think your heart won't change? When the sky starts to cry, I become reminiscent and lonely. Although I like to think I've moved on, I can't help but think that I shouldn't have let go, I should've held on tighter.


The beginning was so pure and pubescent, virgin and untainted.
When a person is gone, should you miss him or remember him?
If you miss him, do you look back at old pictures and cry?
If you remember him, do you think of the tone of his voice, his laughter?
Do you think back to the conversations between you and him?

Conversations between Us?

2007

2008
2009

Baby steps :)

Listening: to people typping on their lappys
Feeling: sick [physicallly]
Time: 920AM

Good morning people .
today i have decided to..
well, kinda take little baby steps
to feel happppierrr
weee :)
besides that fact that i said i loveyou to pat
and he replied, ohh yea uhmmm.
LOL
i was full cut
buh i neeeda grow someeee balls, ew.
and beeeeeeeee more stronger :)
i still have feelings for you, buh i think you dont for me
ohh well .
time will heal
s today
trying to do my assessment
buh fail
im blogging my way tro failing
lol .
workign with kj tonighttt :)
LOL
first shift .
how funnnn .
LOL
hmmm, i love reading tblogspot
especially my usuals: kristy&sharizaaa
i say sharizaaa yesterday at sport, with nonnnnnnnnnnaaa
gosh i miss them
and i miss kristyyyyyyy tooo :(
havnt seen her since transformers .
i like that movie
anywaysss .
i gtg
gunna get told off
laters :)

funny how we had it all but I still love you

Listening: Dc aka. Lover boy - Forever
Feeling: broken down
Time: 133PM

omgsh .
been a weeek .
how have you been patty boy ?
getting over me yet?
coz i cnt be over you .
i didnt talk to you from thursday-saturday
wow thats forever and ever .
sunday we talked
weeee .
wasnt the best convo
coz since you are my bff .
i told you that i started smoking
which i know that its a massive turn off you for
LOL
and you asked me .
"why are you doing this?"
well the reason is that
there is no other way of expressing myself besides crying ..
and trust me ive been crying my eyes out for 5 days straight!
then you said "ever since we broken up youve been doing bad things"
well again, theres no other way for me to grief the losst of a love one .
the main songs in my head :
forever - marc nelson
(forever ever forever forever ever, LOL good times pat)
forever - dc aka. lover boy
beautiful - streetwriterz
(funny how we had it all ><" )
and i look at my folder ,
About 14 things written on my folder is all about you .
and 14 is our number
which makes it worse
let me show youwhats on my folder

1. ohhh reelax [when i talked to much youd say that]
2. gronk [we used to say it alot]
3. d-d-d-dora [you told me i look like dora]
4. oh snap [when we OOOwned someone we used to say ohh snapppppp]
5. aybaybay [what i say to you on the fone :) ]
6. NOOOB [when we do shit retardedly]
7. i loveyou
   
8. dry :)
9. drained
10. i miss pat
11. lameee
12. patty cakes
13. tapme rated
14. empaaaaaaat ftw.

shit that sucks . ><
paaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat .
i missssssyou i pick up the fotos we have, and that just makes me think
"what went wrong ? "
is it my job?
my hormones?
boys?
i dont know
i cried alot todaaaaaaaay ,
shit its not funny any more
im liek breaking apart now .
to people who just fone out that i smoke .
dw im quiiiittting .
:)
i have a protest group to make me stop smoking .
get my nicorette patchets and gum .
LOL.
i reallly neeed a big cryyy
do you still want me to visit you at skewl
after my excursion ?
do you still want me to go autie loi/loy's brithday?
[sorry i forgot how to spell]
LOL hmmmmm ,
i dont think im the right person for you .
you dont deserve the shit i give you .
like seriously .
people think of me as a junkie, ganga, hoe, slut, 2 faced , bitchy
so why would you want me?
ask yourself that ?
:)
no matter how much i try to try and not think about you ,
it jst gets worse.
i cried on emilys lap today at lunch
cozi missed you
i hugged gizelle 34y7285y42 times .
i cried when i was halfway through my food .
LOL :)
ii wrote on my notebooks that "i miss pat" & "i still love pat no matter what"
which reminds me,
i remmeber we wer too scared to say i love you
and we jst said i love pat or i love emm
good times .
i remember alot things about us
most of my memories are with you :(
i cant jst forget the past
"funny how we had it all pat? "
omgshhh ><
now im thinking about memories .
our first everythings :'(
kiss
hugg
hold hands
pash
and so on .
LOL
cnt mentions some
JOKESSSS .
:)
lol america, i was really home sick
LOL
when i cried soo mcuhhh
stupid MOM
mademe cryyy
:)
okay ima gooo .
main quote.

funny how we had it all

not ready

Listening: Taylor Swift - Crazier
Mood: depressed
Time:1114PM

gosh this hard ,
talking to you, not saying i love you, shitty love songs coming up every second.
how can you do it
lol
i know you took off the tapme off your nick
lol i aint ready for that little step
i still wear your jacket and scarf
and our necklace
wow, i aint ready to get over you or move on .
shittty songs .
soooo many songs ==
shit this is gay
i miss you
and i stilll love youuuu .
pattttttyyy cakes :)
everyones going to find out .
i can sense it
lol, sorry if the all found out on my blog
lol, i duno who reads my blogg :)

- `# (L)EMEM. \ ; (R)PAAAAAT is irreplacable :'( says:
LOL YOU TOOK OUT THE TAPME .
big step :)
- P-A-Double TUH-ERS ;) says:
sorry .
you took yours out too
or wait
you never had it ?
- `# (L)EMEM. \ ; (R)PAAAAAT is irreplacable :'( says:
I NEVER HAD A TAPME 1428
- P-A-Double TUH-ERS ;) says:
Ohhs
- `# (L)EMEM. \ ; (R)PAAAAAT is irreplacable :'( says:
ive always hat... pat :)
had*
- P-A-Double TUH-ERS ;) says:
im sorry ..
:(
- `# (L)EMEM. \ ; (R)PAAAAAT is irreplacable :'( says:
breeeeeeatheeee .
- P-A-Double TUH-ERS ;) says:
Im Sorry .

its okay
its jst the fact that, you can handle shit
unlike me
all i do is cry
like i am now :)

lol i get emotional so easy
if i think, talk, or anythign that has to do with you .
- `# (L)EMEM. \ ; (R)PAAAAAT is irreplacable :'( says:
yea
lol me on ther other hand, is not over you and isnt ready t make that little step
coz shes a big baby.

im taking slow baby steps .
oh wellllllllllll
this is a shit weeek .
LOL .
the fact that, we broke it.
im getting in shit at skewl
and i lost my sb
which you know pattty.

i remember the tect i sent andrew - i miss him :)
LOL .

- `# (L)EMEM. \ ; (R)PAAAAAT is irreplacable :'( says:
yeeeeeeeeep
*COUGHIN REALLY REALLY LOUD* i still love you :)
- P-A-Double TUH-ERS ;) says:
i love you too .
i still do
you know i do

wer liek dan and serena, gg season one, last ep .

s- okay the photographers
gone, you can let go now

d- i dont wannt to.

lol BREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEATHEEEE .
LOL
patty you know that signal
it means im tearing or crying
weeee .
crying :)

February 14th 2008- August 3rd 2009

Listening: cascada - everytime we touch [ in my mind]
Feeling: heat broken
time: 1143AM

dear pat,
i have loved you frm the start
like seriously .
our time has ended, but it doesnt mean that our love is over .
i am in ist missng you
i have cried about 10 times today
but it still hurts .
from the end of year 8;
we had the greatest crush on eachother
like seriously
it was so cute
valentines when i asked you in the morning
and when you asked me in the night ,
it was how i call, really lol .
but stilll
last night when it ended was like sobbing
you can hear it in my voice
all im saying is, the reason why i did what we did is becaus ei thought about you, me, our schooling, our time and our grades .
you can do so much better than me,
you can do better at schoool
i love you so muchhhh patttttty
like i did what i did for the best, it doesnt mean that
its wasnt gunna be the best mood
weve been through thick and thin
its harddddd to not think about you
as im thinking about you now
lol .
hmmm, babyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy
dont worry,
youll be fine
time will heal
and things will get better
you have friends that can cheer you
trust me
pat rememebr what we agreeeed on
18 remember?
or sooner?
it depends
i bet we wont alk that much no more
and omgsh
i didnt think it was gong to happen
omgsh i think im tearing up .
shit, i am
anyways
i need be strong
love something let it go, if it comes back that is how you know
and my friend sang that to mee
lol
marquez houston much ?
LOL
patty just becoz we broke it
doesnt mean i dont love you babe :)
see how we wer last ngiht on the fone
trying to say good bye
i got soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo tearyyy
and then after we said i love you , i got more saaaaaaaaaaaad
thinking that this was a mistake,
its not coz this is benefiting us, in a way
becoz im trying to make you focus more on school .
and shit .
pat i dont want to keep you tied down for the rest of your life
thats just slack
pat theres gunna be other girls that you think are more awesome than i will ever be.
sooooooo. pattttt
im doing this for you,
coz i know im a distraction than i insppiration .
coz i can sense it :(
pat if we wer still going out now, all busy and shit
iamgine nxt year
thats even worse
we jst need to take time and relaxxxxx .
well im trying :)
paaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat
no moatter what
i love you i still love you
i will always love youuuu
no matter whaaaaaaaaaaaaaat!
forever and ever and ever .
im telling youuu now .
babyyyy .
last thing .
for now .
dotn worry about me,
think about you and only you for now.
keep me out of your life for now
when your ready you can talk to me and shit :)
well go out ofcourse :D:D:D
LOL .
pat ilov eyou and i miss you haaaaaaaaaaaarrrd
aahha dw, im still going to your aunties birthday on the 22nd aug :)
coz i got no work.
i love youuuu babyyyy .
i miss you
well be okay .
ttyl :)