funny how we had it all but I still love you

Listening: Dc aka. Lover boy - Forever
Feeling: broken down
Time: 133PM

omgsh .
been a weeek .
how have you been patty boy ?
getting over me yet?
coz i cnt be over you .
i didnt talk to you from thursday-saturday
wow thats forever and ever .
sunday we talked
weeee .
wasnt the best convo
coz since you are my bff .
i told you that i started smoking
which i know that its a massive turn off you for
LOL
and you asked me .
"why are you doing this?"
well the reason is that
there is no other way of expressing myself besides crying ..
and trust me ive been crying my eyes out for 5 days straight!
then you said "ever since we broken up youve been doing bad things"
well again, theres no other way for me to grief the losst of a love one .
the main songs in my head :
forever - marc nelson
(forever ever forever forever ever, LOL good times pat)
forever - dc aka. lover boy
beautiful - streetwriterz
(funny how we had it all ><" )
and i look at my folder ,
About 14 things written on my folder is all about you .
and 14 is our number
which makes it worse
let me show youwhats on my folder

1. ohhh reelax [when i talked to much youd say that]
2. gronk [we used to say it alot]
3. d-d-d-dora [you told me i look like dora]
4. oh snap [when we OOOwned someone we used to say ohh snapppppp]
5. aybaybay [what i say to you on the fone :) ]
6. NOOOB [when we do shit retardedly]
7. i loveyou
   
8. dry :)
9. drained
10. i miss pat
11. lameee
12. patty cakes
13. tapme rated
14. empaaaaaaat ftw.

shit that sucks . ><
paaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat .
i missssssyou i pick up the fotos we have, and that just makes me think
"what went wrong ? "
is it my job?
my hormones?
boys?
i dont know
i cried alot todaaaaaaaay ,
shit its not funny any more
im liek breaking apart now .
to people who just fone out that i smoke .
dw im quiiiittting .
:)
i have a protest group to make me stop smoking .
get my nicorette patchets and gum .
LOL.
i reallly neeed a big cryyy
do you still want me to visit you at skewl
after my excursion ?
do you still want me to go autie loi/loy's brithday?
[sorry i forgot how to spell]
LOL hmmmmm ,
i dont think im the right person for you .
you dont deserve the shit i give you .
like seriously .
people think of me as a junkie, ganga, hoe, slut, 2 faced , bitchy
so why would you want me?
ask yourself that ?
:)
no matter how much i try to try and not think about you ,
it jst gets worse.
i cried on emilys lap today at lunch
cozi missed you
i hugged gizelle 34y7285y42 times .
i cried when i was halfway through my food .
LOL :)
ii wrote on my notebooks that "i miss pat" & "i still love pat no matter what"
which reminds me,
i remmeber we wer too scared to say i love you
and we jst said i love pat or i love emm
good times .
i remember alot things about us
most of my memories are with you :(
i cant jst forget the past
"funny how we had it all pat? "
omgshhh ><
now im thinking about memories .
our first everythings :'(
kiss
hugg
hold hands
pash
and so on .
LOL
cnt mentions some
JOKESSSS .
:)
lol america, i was really home sick
LOL
when i cried soo mcuhhh
stupid MOM
mademe cryyy
:)
okay ima gooo .
main quote.

funny how we had it all